Discovering the 5 Stages of a Break Up

There are five main stages that a person will go through after a relationship break up. Going through these stages is very important for the person’s recovery process, but the length of time it will take to go through each stage will vary depending on the individual, the circumstances of the break up, and how much pain the person is going through. It can help a person get through the healing process by breaking it up into the five stages. By understanding each stage, and learning ways to cope with each of the stages, a person is better equipped to handle them and get through the process easier.

Stage 1 – Acknowledgment

The main purpose of this stage is to just understand that a break up has taken place, and that it is real. It’s not important to understand everything that is happening, and in fact, while in this stage, you might feel very scattered and overwhelmed. It may seem like the break up has affected every part of your life, and as a result, you might feel vulnerable and helpless.

During this stage, one of the most important things you can do is to just be aware of your feelings, but don’t feel pressured to completely understand them or do anything about them at this point. Try to think things through as carefully as you can, but understand that you might not be functioning very effectively while in this stage. Try to focus on other positive things in your life, such as exercise, crafts and hobbies, spending time with friends and family, and anything else that you enjoy doing.

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Stage 2 – Let it Out

This stage can be one of the most important steps in the overall healing process after a break up. It’s simply not healthy to keep your feelings trapped inside yourself for a long time. In order to get past the pain of a break up, you are going to have to open up and let things out, instead of just suffering by keeping all your feelings bottled up inside. It can be extremely helpful to the healing process to get your feelings and frustration out into the open, instead of just pretending to be coping with them. You don’t have to feel upset that you are losing control, because the process is healthy for you. It can also help to engage in some creative activities such as writing or drawing, because these types of activities can help you find ways of working your feelings out in a productive and expressive fashion.

Stage 3 – Nurturing

By this stage in the healing process, you will have reached the point where it can be helpful to allow others to help comfort you. Spending time with family and friends that you care about, and allowing them to comfort and take care of you a little bit, can be very helpful. However, keep in mind that they will also probably want to offer their thoughts and opinions on your relationship and break up. They are probably also feeling bad and are suffering as a result of your pain. They might be a little bitter and angry as a result, and might be inclined to want to vent their negative thoughts and feelings that they have against your ex. Keep in mind that they may have their own feelings to work through, and that they are not intentionally trying to cause you any additional grief or pain by telling you these things. It can help to acknowledge their feelings, but to politely ask them to refrain from being negative, as it won’t make you feel better or help you get through the healing process any faster.

Stage 4 – Reward and Fun

By this stage, you have worked through a lot of the pain and suffering, and are probably ready for a little break. Now is the time to do some nice things for yourself that are fun and enjoyable. If you do some things to make yourself feel and look better, it will go a long way towards rewarding yourself for the pain that you have been going through. Remember that sometimes a break up can be an opportunity to find a better you, and that it might ultimately prove to be a new beginning for you, instead of an end.

Stage 5 – Moving On

During the final stage of the process, you will be able to look back, accept the situation of your break up for what it is, consider your future, and just move on with your life. By now, you probably have a good idea of why the break up occurred, who was responsible for what, and how you can avoid similar situations from occurring in future relationships. You are no longer spending your time thinking about your ex, and you can look back on your former relationship as a part of your past, but move on to your future.

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