Why Rebound Relationships Don’t Work
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A lot of people involve themselves in a rebound relationship as a desperate attempt to avoid pain or the mere confrontation of it. It’s not only cruel to the rebound person you’re using, but also cruel to your ex who, after all, is still wanting to get back to you but just needs time and space alone. Being human and being wiser means that we have to brave our pains, learn, and grow from them – because the more we hide it, the more we suffer for it long term.
1. Rebound relationships are what the word implies: rebound. The guy feels the need to divert, and he thinks that the only best way is to go out with someone else. Same thing with a woman. It’s all too painful so you might want to bounce off from the pain by getting into another relationship. Heck, you deserve someone better so you end up in a relationship that will eventually end into a rebound.
2. Rebounds are the result of wrong advices saying that jealousy is the best way to get your ex back. Well it’s not. When people see their exes that have moved on, they move on as well. You are wasting on the chance to get back your ex with rebounds. Recovering from a breakup will never ever mean that you should be sleeping around or masking your pain by entering another relationship that you’re not even sure to last.
3. When you get into a rebound, you’re hurting people – the rebound person, your ex, even yourself. You’re wasting time, energy and effort on something that will not last but just a selfish desire to get even. Your hurt will not be properly justified if you keep on hurting other people. Breakup distances are meant to heal you ALONE and for you to become a better person on your next relationship; the purpose of which is to lessen, if not avoid, that kind of pain again in the future. So when you hurt other people, little do you know that you’re hurting yourself all the more.
4. People in a rebound relationship are bound to inflict more damage on themselves than those who didn’t. The reason why you needed space in the breakup is to sort yourself out FIRST – your issues, what happened in your relationship that caused the breakup, and how to correct those mistakes, and to properly heal because healing takes a lot of time and reflection. When you go to a rebound affair, the important time that you need for healing and reflection don’t happen at all, because of the sweet time and flirtation going around, but when it fails, you’re only apt to double the hurt.
5. A rebound relationship will not only encourage you to continue the vicious cycle of short term affairs often with nasty and even more painful endings, but will prove yourself that you will never keep lasting relationships because you never learned how to. The real purpose of the breakup is to cool your mind, stabilize your emotions, gain proper and logical control of your life, and learn how to maintain lasting relationships in the future. Ending one relationship after another is not only unhealthy and damaging, but once you don’t stop the cycle you’ll never get to the end of it. The result? You’re covering your own heartache with another heartache and you are entirely depending your own happiness to someone who can drop you like a hot potato. You have the choice to be happy; and only you can give that happiness to yourself – and nobody else will do that for you.
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